I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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