woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize