was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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