I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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