You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
