All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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