"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize