Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I'm always down for nudity.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
