Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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