direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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