We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
