BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
