he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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