Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
