She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
If its not for food we ain't going out.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
