did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize