I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
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