so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
