I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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