after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
should my penis look like a turkey
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
