my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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