She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
