Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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