I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
