what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
