so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
