I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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