Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
