You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i will never coherently bang her
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
