you guys were way drunker than both of me
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
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officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
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Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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