Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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