So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Randomize
