watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
My ATM looks so different sober.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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