Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
