508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
