I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
