Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
