Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
