don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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