when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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