This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
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His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
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party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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