why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
