haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
How naked do you want me to be?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize