I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize
