Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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