Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I have fence marks all over my body
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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