allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize