And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
