Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.