life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up