Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
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speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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